Thursday, July 5, 2012

July year later

What a whirlwind of a year this last one has been! I was blessed to be able to be in Washington D.C. last year for the 4th of July and this year I felt blessed again to spend it with my amazing family. I am so excited to show how far I have become-I'm happier than I thought I could be. When Josh and I got divorced I didn't know that I could be truly happy again-but I think I have found that again. I have realized that I hadn't been happy for a long time with myself leading to letting myself go and getting deeper into a hole of depression and self loathing. I can look back now and see that and say that-at the time I couldn't. 2010 was a rough year. When I went to D.C. in 2011 I thought I was happy-I had lost 20 lbs. or so and thought I was doing good but I was still hung up on the past. Looking back now I almost don't recognize myself-more the "pretending to be happy Alli"-I have very few pictures from the last few years because I wasn't happy. But I feel like I have found a place where I am now happy and secure with who I am. I feel blessed for the life I lead. To those that have stuck by me-THANK YOU! To those that have left my life for one reason or another-Good luck! I am loving who I have become and enjoying the journey. I have met some friends who I can't imagine my life without-ones who I look back and can't remember not being friends with-whose children have become adopted nieces and nephews-Thank you Cathy and Diane. Ok enough of the are my official one year pictures :) 75+ lbs gone! But that doesn't count the emotional weight that I no longer feel! July 4, 2011 I was "blending" at the art museum.
Before heading out for the bbq!
July 2012 at Magna Park-fireworks with the family!
Side by side!

Monday, March 26, 2012

Here I am :)

Well in some aspects I am a major slacker (this blog) but in other news I have a timeline that I would like to show-one that while I'm not proud of the beginning point I am proud of where I am now. This blog is mine to remind myself of the journey and path my life has taken. It is definitely not where I thought I'd be. Looking back I never felt overweight or unattractive-and I have always had a knack for being able to dress to my size and shape and look smaller than I actually am. Now for the picture...then I'll talk about it.....

I don't have many pictures from 2010 or 2011-I refused to have it taken and when it was I usually deleted it. The picture on the far left (in blue) was taken at the digging up of a time capsule from freshman year with my "AJ Girls" at this point I was my heaviest-I weighed 215-220 pounds and I was wearing size 18 clothes. I am now at 150 pounds and a size 8 or 10.

Many times along this journey I have been asked what my goal weight is-the truth I haven't had a goal weight at any point-my goal was simply to feel healthy again-I wanted to be in control of my life and decided that I would start to be healthy and just see where that took me.

My secret? There isn't one-just being healthy again. I refused to give up any foods at all-those of you that know me know that I LOVE my treats, soda, and snacks. So with that in consideration I very possibly could have lost the weight faster but would gain it right back because I couldn't give it up permanently. So instead I changed my biggest meal to lunch and I try (not always successfully) to not eat after 7 pm on school nights. By always having treats/snacks available at home (and in my purse) they really aren't as much of a temptation and I don't need as much to satisfy my snack urge.