Time Flies

Time flies when you're having fun....and even when you're not! :) I still can't believe we are over halfway through June! I made it through my first year of teaching middle school and my 2nd year of teaching! I am learning more and more each day! I can't tell you how relieved I am that I made it through! I am already loving the stay up late nights and sleep in days :) I'm looking forward to some fun summer plans! I've already been able to read 4 books, spend time with my awesome nephews, had some barbeques, and some serious relaxing time :). I still have lots of fun things and can't wait to finish up my rearranging and cleaning of my patio!

In May we had Memorial Day....this has always been a big day for our family but especially since Riley's passing. The pics are of his headstone, with some family, and some of us spending time at my Grandma's house talking about our ancestors and those that protect our country.

At the beginning of June I was able to go with my dear friends Tyson and Melissa to Vegas to see them be sealed. I have known Tyson since we were really little-he's like a brother to me. After Josh and I separated and got divorced Tyson and Melissa were some of my truest friends. Tyson could not have married anyone more perfect for him-I love Melissa! It has been so fun getting to know her and be able to become friends. They are a fun couple and I love that they let me hang with them :)

I was able to take my 9th graders to Lagoon for 9th grade Lagoon day! It was a blast! I love the teachers that I work with. Who knew water guns and shooting at unexpecting students could be so fun :)
I have begun to get used to being single again. I started going to a singles ward and man do they have activities-this week we had something every day Sunday-Saturday! I didn't go to all of them but it was a blast! I'm excited to get out and about again with people my age :) I have to say thanks to all the friends who have stood by me these last few months-I know I haven't been too much fun-I promise it's getting better. Letting go of Josh and all that those words entail have been difficult and at times I haven't been too positive. So thank you to those that have been a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and a person to distract me. I can only hope to continue to progress and try to be happy. In the words of my favorite Dori...I'll "just keep swimming" :) This last pic is of a student from last year...LOVE him! I got to see him last Tuesday and he immediately ran up and hugged me! I haven't seen him forever and love that he remembers me!

Nothing

Wow! That is all I have to say...it has been a doozy of a week-well month for that matter. I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off! I am so looking forward to Spring Break-the warm California sun is calling me! It is amazing to me that I have been teaching middle school for 135 days! Only 40 to go before summer break! I have been so blessed with a wonderful group of kids this year-last year was great too in a different way. It seems the Lord really does know what I need and has placed me with kids that will help me be a better person and teacher. The last month at our school has been a hard one for sure though. We have had 3 student deaths in the last few weeks-each from differing things-while I didn't personally know any of the students I felt a true sadness with each one. I have been incredibly impressed with how well the school responded and how supportive the faculty and staff have been towards each other and the students. As we begin a new program at our school I am quietly reminded of how I wish that Riley would have told someone about the pain he was feeling-that I could have done something to help him. But alas we cannot turn back time-I can't change what happened. I miss Riley each day but lately I have felt him more and his love for me. I think he would be proud of me-of who I am becoming. This post really has no point and I am rambling...so I will cut it off here. Have a great day! :)

Me...that's all I have to give

Lately I have had a great song by Faith Hill come to mind.

Me
That's all I have to give
What you get is what you see, yeah
No second guessing, no pretending
All I ever have to be is me

This is who I am...while I believe that of course people change and grow there are fundamental things embedded within us that at the age of 25 just aren't really going anywhere. I enjoy being me. I know I have little quirks and some might say that a few of them are pretty strange but I like them. I am proud of how far I have come in my life and where I am. 2010 was the hardest year of my entire life-this is my journal so I am going to share-if you don't want to know then stop reading now. While there were many good things that happened in 2010 I also went through some rough times. In January my little and only brother died-it was a shock and caused/causes much heartache and sorrow. February and March brought many medical tests and even a sleep study-they still can't figure out what is wrong with me :). April and May I finished my first year of teaching and had to say goodbye to some of the best teachers I have ever met-knowing that I was going to a new school-I was leaving elementary and going to the middle school-it was a hard thought to swallow-I was going from a school with 4 classrooms just like mine to me being the only teacher at a school teaching students with disabilities. (on a side note it is a wonderful school and I am enjoying being here and excited to stay next year). June brought a surgery for my mom. July was Chelsi's (my baby sister) turn to have surgery-should have been a routine tonsillectomy but it wasn't-she did well while in surgery and in recovery-2 days after being sent home her body decided that the medication prescribed to her was too much and her lungs collapsed-my mom found her unconscious and not breathing and called 911. Chelsi spent a few days in the hospital and is now doing fine but gave us all a good scare. August came and I further prepared for the school year. On August 24 (what would be my 2nd day of school) I received a phone call at 1:30 in the morning from my mom to let me know that Karli (sister just younger than me) had been in a car accident and was injured pretty badly. Karli ended up breaking lots of bones and was in the hospital for several weeks and a hospital bed in my parents home for several months. We call her bionic woman now and tell her she is quite "screwed". She has worked very hard on rehabilitation and is walking and back to work now but she also gave us a really big scare. September came and Josh and I separated. I don't think this is the forum to discuss the details and really it isn't anyone's business-but it was a hard time and not something anyone wants to go through. The next few months brought rough times at work and struggling with students and their behaviors. Teaching special education is something I am very passionate about and I love-that love was tested this year. There are small things that added up to make a more difficult year but these are the biggies.

BUT I survived. I am still here and I am still happy. I learned so many things about myself over the last year or so. I am able to see that and able to see growth. I hope to be able to keep that up. I am learning more and more how much I love teaching and love the amazing students that I get to work with. I feel blessed that parents entrust their children to me and allow me to try and help them grow. I am excited to be able to stay at the same school next year and even keep the bulk of my students. While I may be stuck in my ways in some things I see changes coming. I have a hope for the future and can't wait to see what it will bring me. Hopefully I will keep this updated more than I did before. Thanks for sticking around to read all this!